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Gender Politics: The 50/50 Rule

STEPHINE

 

20180909_235211_0001142482825.pngMen paying the bills is slowly disintegrating as women ‘feminists’  somewhat wants equal responsibilities asides equal rights; which in my opinion is very fair. I feel in every relationship it is important to talk about finances; I mean it is very crucial.

The normal tradition is that a man is to take care of any and every bill that concerns a relationship and home because it is a thing of pride to them. However, as time goes by this tradition is slowly changing.

For instance, a man invites a lady on a date, who is to pick up the cheque? Typically, it is the man that should pay and vice-versa-if a woman invite a man on a date, she should pick up the cheque- I mean if you will agree with me it is common sense. However, if you are being invited on a date, please order for what you can afford- that means you should take your wallet along with you so you don’t get stranded.

So, on who is to pay the bills generally in a relationship, my answer would be that the bills should be shared. This is no way taking the so-called ‘Pride’ from the man. It is called ‘helping out’-this is subject to the salaries we earn . For instance in a marriage, I feel it is standard for the man to pay the fees of the children, pay the house rent, then I can help with the housekeeping; however I am open to helping out more- this helps the lifestyle of the couple.

However, if the man insists on paying all the bills in the house, I would save/ invest part of my earnings for the dry days; so we are not left stranded.

Writing on this topic made me realize that it is more complicated that is seems. Please, I would love to have your opinion on this topic because it is not ‘black and white’, it has it gray areas too.

Let’s Discuss.

Love,

Ugo♥

Image: Pinterest

Published by STEPHINE

Aspiring Attorney for the Nigerian Creative Industry.

24 thoughts on “Gender Politics: The 50/50 Rule”

  1. You make a great point ..I think the first step is people should communicate about finances in a relationship and not assume ..so its more like I want to order this, is it okay with you or what’s your budget like …

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  2. First of all: Thank you for brining awareness to this important topic. I also think it is important to look at why it is so typical for the man in the relationship to take care of the finances. For a very long time in history, women married not because of love but because they needed someone to take care of them, someone who was able to feed them and their children. Love was just a nice bonus if it existed. Of course things thankfully changed over time but even though women started working it was still in the heads of the people that men are supposed to be the ones taking care of the finances. For a long time women made way less than men did. I know that it is still not equal but we made progress— we are still making progress. And I feel that if you make enough money as a woman to provide for your family, you should do your part and help out your husband. And it always depends on the situation: If you have a working dad and a stay at home mom (or a stay at home dad and a working mom) you can’t really expect them to do fifty-fifty. But I think it is important to talk about it and to decide what is best for the family. Relationships are about helping each other out and being there for each other. In all matters. At least that is my opinion. (And wow that was a really long comment!)

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  3. Good stuff you’ve written about. It’s just, everyone is entitled to their opinions respectively and this is yours which is nice. In my opinion though, it depends on the individuals in the relationship.you know,one man’s food they say,is another man’s poison.Honestly,there are a lot of things to be considered when you talk about sharing the bills.. Like the status of both parties,e.t.c..You know,the most effective and well honoured decisions in relationship are those that are of mutual understanding and agreement… And then even some relationships lack this and they’re still ok with it. In conclusion, things like this differ for different people.Thank you.

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  6. I like this post very much cos of its open-minded nature. Nonetheless, I feel in a marriage, the manner in which the finances will be operated and managed should be discussed by the couple before entering the marriage and should be reviewed occasionally as the marriage grows as well. However, just like you said, it’s not always in black and white

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  8. I’ll let you in one secret in life, that I utilise so much…..”just pick it up”….at the end of the day, it won’t matter, really, who did the picking and calling!

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  9. It is a very complicated topic and there is no formula that fits all couples. It’s a great post to make people reflect. Hope everyone discusses finances with their significant other, it makes for an easier relationship when you have clear expectations.

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  10. Often times, when we get blinded by love at the onset of a relationship, we think, love will take care of the finances and everything will just fall into place as we go. Things will not just fall in place. It is important that we plan and discuss what are expectations are but ultimately, consider each other’s interest

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  12. I think each couple has to work together and communicate about money and finances. It can be tough but it helps if we work together to deal with our money situation.

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